idaho

january 26-30th, 

the girls & i had the opportunity to fly to idaho 

to visit my dad, my stepmom, and my nana.

with charlotte's 2nd birthday just weeks away,

it made sense to take her on one last free flight.

the girls were SO excited to fly on an airplane.

i was excited for the trip, but less excited about flying with 2 kids.

(excuse the numerous iphone pics throughout.. sometimes you gotta use what you already have in your hand!)

overall, the girls did so good on the plane.

thank goodness for iPads & v-readers!

the layovers were a bit trickier as i tried to keep two girls busy

while lugging around 2 carry-on suitcases, 2 backpacks, a diaper bag, and a stroller

(you can see my super-mommy solution in the photo on the top right- bella in the stroller, 2 suitcases attached to the handles with backpacks on top of them, and charlotte riding the suitcases!)

there were definitely some crazy moments, but we made it safe and sound.

the girls got to see their grandparents (my dad & his wife, patty)

last summer.

but it has been awhile since they saw my nana.

charlotte & i flew out to see her in september of 2010 when she was 6 months old.

bella's last trip to idaho was in july of 2009- she was just 19 months old!

(and i had just found out i was pregnant with charlotte ;)

they had both changed quite a bit since nana last saw them.

it was definitely time for them to see grandma, grandad, and nana 'idaho' :)

the girls were SO excited to find out that both my dad & patty, 

and my nana have little dogs at their house!

those little dachshunds got a LOT of love.  and plenty of exercise.

bella would have played with them all day long.

the girls loved playing fetch with the dogs & giving them treats.

charlotte would say 'drop it!' and be so proud of herself.

we stayed at my nana's house.

she had made a special little table for the girls to eat at.

i love this picture of my nana.

it is the picture i have of her in my head- drinking her coffee & doing her puzzles 

with maggie on her lap (buried by the newspaper).

i miss her so much- only seeing her every few years breaks my heart.

she has always been so special to me.

i was so very grateful to be with her.

my grandad passed away almost nine years ago.

how i wish he was still here to meet & love my children.

i know they would have loved him. and he would have been delighted by them.

i miss him so much.

as far back as i can remember,

my nana has drank her coffee out of the same cup.

i love these mustard coffee mugs and the hands that hold them.

walking around my nana's house is a step back to my childhood.

my nana is a collector, and there are so many memories of growing up in every nook of her home.

these teacups were one of my favorite things to play with when i was a little girl.

it was always such a special treat to drink out of them.

i look forward to the day when my girls are old enough to do the same.

idaho is cold.

especially for these orange county wimps.

the day we flew out it was 75 degrees in irvine.

we arrived to 30 degree weather.

it was too chilly to spend much time outside,

so we found this awesome indoor playground for kids.

we ended up spending two afternoons there.

the photo on the top right shows the entrance- it was 3 layers high,

full of tunnels, bridges, slides, and crazy fun.

there was even a giant ball pit!

the girls were in heaven.

we also just had fun hanging out as a family.

grandad & charlotte.

heart.

this little lady got to show off some of her spicy side.

she is full of ideas & opinions, and starts most phrases with 'i!'

(i do it!  i phone! i eat!)

patty has a fun kitchen full of different chickens.

there is a large rooster next to the fridge that charlotte was determined to ride.

"i chicken!  i ride!"

we finally convinced her to just share her binky with the rooster instead.

bella & patty spent some time putting together a special princess puzzle.

so sweet.

(the only bummer was it was one of those puzzles that change depending on how you look at it.

so confusing for bella...no more lenticular puzzles!)

 

my dad is a big hunter/fisher/atv-er/outdoorsman.

his favorite store is called cabella's.

it is pretty fun- there is a giant fish tank

and the center of the store has a huge display of all different animals

(kinda creepy since you know they were once alive)

from chipmunks to a moose to a polar bear.

the girls were fascinated.

before we knew it, 

our time in idaho was over.

we had so much fun reconnecting with family that we miss so much.

good food, lots of laughs, and doggy kisses galore.

it was sad to say goodbye, not knowing when we'll get to see them again.

 but we are so grateful for the time we had in idaho.

we love you dad, patty & nana.

hope to see you soon!

xoxo

shara got her groove back

man, that was rough.

january was not super fun.

you could probably tell that from my sad, pathetic posts.

sickness, dieting, frustrating circumstances- 

all things combined to make one grumpy girl.

i hated feeling that way.

i so desperately wanted to shake the funk.

wanted to be joyful, enjoy life, smile more.

but i just felt like i was drowning and could not get out.

i'd wake up and say 'this is going to be a great day!' 

and an hour later be totally crying.  over nothing.  so lame.

i was really fun to be around.

(obvious sarcasm)

my husband is a kind, sweet, patient man.

i did a lot of praying in january.

as always- God is faithful to speak to my heart.

i'm working through what it is i need to learn in these circumstances,

and what it is to be joyful even when your heart (and body) is sad.

i went to bed sunday night, praying that the funk would end.

i wanted to smile again.  love my children.  enjoy all He has blessed me with.

i know some sweet friends were praying for me too, 

encouraging me through this rough patch.

i think the funk is over.

the last few days have been great.

not to say there aren't things that have been hard or frustrating come up

(hello- i have 3 little kids!)

but how my head and heart respond feel so much better.

so much more me.

thank you, Jesus.

nurture started back up today

and i was SO glad to be sitting around a table with some of my favorite women.

i heart nurture.

the cleanse ends today.

i'm pretty happy about that, too.

i'm ready to eat paleo, work out consistently, and just be healthy.

from now on- good lifestyle habits vs crazy (unsuccessful) diets.

goodbye cleanse- you will not be missed.

we finally found a gym to join here that doesn't cost the same amount as our rent.

(seriously.  there are gyms here that charge $145/person.  excuse me?  are you working out FOR me?  you know i still have to come here and exercise right?  ca-razy sauce people.)

i'm so excited to be able to have some quiet mommy time a few days a week,

getting healthy while my kids play in the kid gym (which they love!).

and the thought of weekly zumba classes sets my heart aflutter.

i've been able to have some friend time, which has been lovely.

i think all that in-house-sickness made me desperate for friend interaction,

especially after feeling so surrounded by people i love during christmas.

i'm so grateful for the friends in fresno who continue to love me, pursue me, and encourage me.

and for my new friends here that make me feel like we've been friends for years.

God has been so good to me.

so peeps- i think i'm back.

not perfect, but me.

shara bachman.

ready to enjoy 2012.

(minus january.  let us never speak of that again)

she's got the funk

january is the worst month.

december is full of twinkly lights, friends & cookies.

it's christmas carols, parties & hope.

and then comes january.

january with houses that feel empty after the christmas decorations are down.

january with healthy eating and regular exercise.

january with resolutions that are broken before the month is over.

january always puts me in a funk.

i haven't blogged much this month because, well-

there hasn't been a whole lot of great stuff to say.

every year, jeff & i get halfway through january and say

"man, i hope this isn't how the rest of the year is going to be."

usually- things look brighter come february.

this january has not been easy.

financial hits, family issues, and sickness are taking their toll.

throw in the cleanse and i'm in full grumpzilla mode.

i'm 2 weeks into the cleanse.  i had lost 4 pounds.

but somehow... i gained them all back.

and i have not cheated.  not once.

i even had to make cookies for one of jeff's meetings, and i didn't eat a single chocolate chip.

but no weight loss.

the first 4-5 days of the cleanse left me with migraines as my body detoxed from all the caffeine, sugar & other yuckies in my body.

i was finally starting to feel better and then....

i got strep throat.

i used to roll my eyes when people complained about sore throats.

no longer.  this is sheer pain & misery i wouldn't wish on anyone.

throw in 3 restless kids & a good case of mommy guilt over their movie-watching while i try to recover...

not helping the funk.

so i've been basically stuck inside with kids for weeks.

unable to really hang out with anyone.

feeling lonely and sorry for myself.

not a pretty combination.

fairly pathetic, in fact.

january- i'm so over you.

i'm ready to be back to myself.

ready to see the outside world again.

ready to actually eat my meals rather than drink them.

so forgive me if i don't blog until the funk is gone.

i figure you, my sweet readers, only deserve one sad, mopey blog every few months, right?

c'mon february.

i need some sunshine.

the cleanse

i'm not a girl who diets.

we did the south beach diet when we lived in davis.

i lasted 3 days. maybe.

when jeff & i got married, i was a skinny little thing.

108 pounds, a size 2.

then we moved to fresno.

and for the next 5+ years, i was either pregnant or nursing.

and no longer 108 pounds.

or anything even remotely close to that.

so this new year rolled around.

and i have a long list of resolutions.

like most of the country, getting in shape is on my list.

i'm not going to say i'm fat.

because i know i'm not.

and i hate it when skinny people say they are fat.

(one of my number one pet peeves.  seriously.  

how annoying is it to hear a skinny person talk about how much weight they need to lose?)

but i am also not saying i'm skinny.

cause that is no longer true.

let's call it fluffy, kay?

i'm a little fluffy.

and more than that... just out of shape.

and tired of it.

and tired of thinking about myself.

so jeff & i decided to go radical to start the year.

we were thinking about eating paleo

(which we are going to do starting in february)

but felt like we needed a jump-start to really get us going.

so our friends told us about this cleanse they do every january & june.

basically:

no dairy, wheat, sugar, red meat, caffeine, eggs, acids...

you (like me) might be thinking... so what DO you eat?

fruits (minus oranges, grapes & tomatoes), veggies, chicken, fish, brown rice.

we 'juice' our breakfast & dinner and eat a healthy lunch.

so my days look a lot like this right now:

(HUGE thank you to my friend, aimee, for the juicer!!!)

i'm hungry.

and (not gonna lie) totally a bit cranky.

and i've lost zero pounds in a week.

my husband, however, has lost like 8.

men.

but i'm sticking with it.

i'm doing this thing.

cause it's going to start working, right?

please say yes!

and after this, paleo eating is going to be a cinch!

what i will say, is that it does feel really good to eat, well, good.

after the holidays and a week of traveling and eating total junk,

the idea of fast food was revolting to me.

i was ready for some healthy.

it's kinda fun to try to think creatively of what to eat.

and i've tried things in the last week that i never would have eaten before.

(kale! spaghetti squash! ginger! black beans! tilapia!)

now why am i telling you this?

well, first... so you know why i may be a bit grumpy.

but mostly... for accountability.

when you make goals, it's easy to cheat.

to let them go.

so ask me how i'm doing.

ask me if i've snuck any chips or cookies.

(which i haven't, btw)

and maybe pray for a little extra for my family as i try things that are hard for me.

so while i'm at it, here are my goals for 2012

(in no particular order)

ask me how it's going.

i hope i can tell you....great!

********shara's goals for 2012*********

1.  begin year with cleanse and move to paleo eating in february for healthier 

2. run a 10K and consistently participate in exercise

3. consistent quiet times throughout the week.

4. weekly family night with devotion

5. intentionality with my kids, husband, & friends

6. find a place to serve in ministry

7. move forward with photography business

8. make beds everyday.

9. look to the needs of others before myself

10. not put myself or others down

so there you go.

did you make any goals for 2012?

how are they going?

one more month

today my little charlotte turned 23 months old.

it seems like a silly number to keep track of,

but it's significant to me.

in one month, she'll turn two years old.

this is my last month with a one year old.

a baby.

in truth- she isn't a baby anymore.

she's a talking, running, dancing little girl.

but she's my baby.

i've been having a lot of trouble with her turning two.

being done with babies.

i recognize i could have 15 kids and i would still feel so sad when the youngest got older.

3 kids is right for us.

but it is still so sad to see them growing so quickly.

i miss tiny feet.

curled up snuggles.

cooing.

babies that don't move when you set them down.

happy little toothless smiles.

today is a reminder to take in every second of it.

because it goes so very fast.

i have one more month to be a mommy of a one-year-old.

i want to cherish every second of it.

here are a few pictures of my baby girl :)

 

 

and some sister loves

i love you, sweet charlotte monroe.

i hope january is a very slow month.

new new years

since jackson was a baby,

we've had the new years tradition of heading to the zoo.

kids don't seem to get the idea that new years is for sleeping in and watching movies.

the zoo was always empty

and it gave us something fun to do as a family.

here are the kiddos in 2008

2009 

(check out charlotte in my belly!)

in 2010 we won a contest and had a photographer join us for the morning. 

you can see those awesome pics here.

well, this year the fresno zoo was just a bit too far away.

so we started a new new years tradition....

the aquarium!

we had gone a month ago with jeff's parents & loved it.

we got to see some cool different things this time.

 the fish are always a hit!

playing outside

listening to the storytime.

i'm not sure if charlotte liked the story....

touching the sharks & sting rays

checking the map

the coolest thing we were able to do was feed the lorakeets.

after you purchase a cup of food, the birds will fly right onto your arm and eat out of your hand.

bella was in animal heaven.

hooray for another great new years!

i think the aquarium will be the perfect place to continue our new tradition.

hello and goodbye.

seriously,

i cannot believe it's already 2012.

last year was a bit of a whirlwind.

so much changed in 2011.

looking back, it's a bit overwhelming:

*we started our year with charlotte a baby, learning to walk, and  turning one in february

*in february, jackson was officially diagnosed with autism

*april 7th brought 10 years of marriage, and we celebrated with a trip to mexico in may

*in june jeff traveled to israel

*we went to pondo & rcp for summer camps

*jackson became a reader

*jeff graduated with his masters degree in august

*jackson started kindergarten

*i officially launched bachmanville photography

*and of course at the end of the summer...

the biggest change of all...

which meant moving, yard sales, and a new church to call home.

leaving everything we knew behind and starting over.

this year has been hard.  really hard.

but also....really wonderful.

maybe the best year i've had in a very long time.

and it has very little to do with any of the things i listed.

because this year i got to experience God in a way i haven't for a long time.

2011 began with me feeling very comfortable,

very complacent in my relationship with God.

my life was settled.  known. 

i loved God.  i 'served' God.

but i didn't really need Him.

it was easy to give Him the occasional high five and then go back about my life.

and then He decided to shake it up.

turn it upside down.

i am so glad.

when we moved, i have never felt so alone.

so sad.  so insecure.  

so unsure of everything in my life.

i was forced to rely on something, someone, bigger than myself.

to let God be God.

if He called us here, He was going to take care of me.

and He has.

i have seen God work profoundly in my life these past months.

in my husband's life.

in my family's life.

the church He placed us in,

the friends He provided,

the opportunities He gave me 

have caused me to look at myself, recognize my need,

and draw so much closer to Him.

in 2011, 

God was here.

with me.

every step.

it was not easy.  

but it was good.

in 2011 i learned to trust Him.

because He is God, and i am not.

i don't know where He is going to lead us in 2012.

but i have great hopes for what my life will look like a year from now.

i am excited about what He is doing in my heart, my mind, my life right now.

i am ready to experience all He has for me.

so bring on 2012.

whatever it has, i think it's going to be good.