double negative

today we turned down two houses.

it seems like a crazy thing to do,

especially with how hard it has been to find anything we have loved.

one home was darling,

with great updates and a park for a backyard.

but tiny. crazy tiny.

just too tiny for our family long-term.

the other was very pretty.

all upgraded and more space.

but expensive.

more than we could afford.

i tried to figure out how to make each of them work.

i could turn the garage into a playroom!

i could have a lemonade stand! or sell things on ebay!

i could have a triple-bunk-bed made!

and then i prayed.

and asked friends to pray.

at the end of today...

we didn't have peace about either home.

i feel a call on my heart to wait.

which is not my favorite thing to do

and trust that god has this.

jeff spoke with a wise friend yesterday,

who answered the phone by saying

"i was just praying for you today! 

and the word that kept coming to my mind was 'the 11th hour'".  

god's timing is not my timing.

but his timing is always perfect.

so every day is a baby step.

trusting he has a neighborhood he is preparing for us.

a school for my children.

a home for our family.

i so want to learn the lessons he has for me in this situation.

(um, especially so he doesn't feel a need to teach it to me again! :)

a sweet friend gave me the jesus calling book last night, and the devotional said this:

stop worrying long enough to hear My voice.  i speak softly to you, in the depths of your inner being.  your mind shuttles back and forth, hither and yon, weaving webs of anxious confusion.  as My thoughts rise up within you, they become entangled in those sticky webs of worry.  thus, My voice is muffled, and you hear only 'white noise'.  

ask My Spirit to quiet your mind so that you can think My thoughts.  this ability is an awesome benefit of being My child, patterned after My own image.  do not be deafened by the noise of the world or that of your own thinking.  instead, by transformed by the renewing of your mind.  sit quietly in My Presence, letting My thoughts reprogram your thinking.

so good, right?

i wanted to share this today,

because i know there are many of us wrestling with 

the questions and worries of life.

circumstances are different,

but we all face choices, and sometimes it is so hard to hear god's voice.

today i was reminded to stop and listen.

and to trust him, even when it's scary.

i can't wait to share good news with you soon...

because i know he has the perfect house for us.

and i am excited to see it...

whenever he decides to let me.