hello and goodbye.

seriously,

i cannot believe it's already 2012.

last year was a bit of a whirlwind.

so much changed in 2011.

looking back, it's a bit overwhelming:

*we started our year with charlotte a baby, learning to walk, and  turning one in february

*in february, jackson was officially diagnosed with autism

*april 7th brought 10 years of marriage, and we celebrated with a trip to mexico in may

*in june jeff traveled to israel

*we went to pondo & rcp for summer camps

*jackson became a reader

*jeff graduated with his masters degree in august

*jackson started kindergarten

*i officially launched bachmanville photography

*and of course at the end of the summer...

the biggest change of all...

which meant moving, yard sales, and a new church to call home.

leaving everything we knew behind and starting over.

this year has been hard.  really hard.

but also....really wonderful.

maybe the best year i've had in a very long time.

and it has very little to do with any of the things i listed.

because this year i got to experience God in a way i haven't for a long time.

2011 began with me feeling very comfortable,

very complacent in my relationship with God.

my life was settled.  known. 

i loved God.  i 'served' God.

but i didn't really need Him.

it was easy to give Him the occasional high five and then go back about my life.

and then He decided to shake it up.

turn it upside down.

i am so glad.

when we moved, i have never felt so alone.

so sad.  so insecure.  

so unsure of everything in my life.

i was forced to rely on something, someone, bigger than myself.

to let God be God.

if He called us here, He was going to take care of me.

and He has.

i have seen God work profoundly in my life these past months.

in my husband's life.

in my family's life.

the church He placed us in,

the friends He provided,

the opportunities He gave me 

have caused me to look at myself, recognize my need,

and draw so much closer to Him.

in 2011, 

God was here.

with me.

every step.

it was not easy.  

but it was good.

in 2011 i learned to trust Him.

because He is God, and i am not.

i don't know where He is going to lead us in 2012.

but i have great hopes for what my life will look like a year from now.

i am excited about what He is doing in my heart, my mind, my life right now.

i am ready to experience all He has for me.

so bring on 2012.

whatever it has, i think it's going to be good.